Having a loved one addicted to drugs/alcohol can be like living on an emotional roller coaster.  Choosing to support someone with an addiction is not easy but it can result in positive changes.  Supporting your family member can be a long, chaotic journey, we can help support you through it.

How to cope better with the journey

The Early Stages

Seek help.  Don't deal with things in isolation.  Talk openly to your partner and the rest of your family.

Knowledge is power.  Be informed.  Educate yourself about drugs and the issues.

Listen to the drug user.  Look for cues that they want to talk.

Try to avoid control and direction.  This usually leads to more underground activity and resistance to change.

 

Basics for supporting someone who uses drugs

• Open, honest communication is always the best policy.  Trust is a major issue for you and the drug user

• Acceptance is not the same as approval

• Accept that someone's drug use cannot be controlled by another person

• Support is not the same as rescue

• Love and acceptance are not the same as being a 'doormat'

• Be clear on boundaries

• Remember that there is no right or wrong way of dealing with drug misuse.  Different situations demand different strategies

• Separate negative behaviour from the person that you love

• Don't be afraid to talk to people and ask for help

• No treatment will work until he/she wants it to

• Not every treatment is right for every person

• Lapsing should not be seen as failure.  It is normal

• Families also need help, not just the drug user.

• Expression of emotions and acknowledgement of feelings is therapeutic.  Sharing experiences with other families by joining a support group is a good way to do this.

• Never give up hope

Coping tips for you

Don't put your life on hold.  Continue to do the things that you enjoy.

Don't isolate yourself from your friends and family.  They can be a vital support to you

Walk away from confrontations.  Put off discussions if you are not calm.

Try writing a letter if you are unable to talk

Set workable boundaries with acceptable consequences.  Don't set yourself up for failure.